Science Jokes

Mr. Brown was telling his son a bed-time story.
"Once upon a time there was a white bunny..."
"Jeez..dad it's boring,what about science fiction?"
"Ok,Ok" Mr Brown said.
"Once upon a time there was a Bunny who got onto a spacecraft and...."
"Dad, a little more grown up!"
"Do you promise me not to tell your mom?" asked Mr Brown.
" I swear!"
"Ok", "Once upon a time there was a naked bunny..."

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The science graduate asks, "Why does it work?"

The engineering graduate asks, "How does it work?"

The accounting graduate asks, "How much does it cost?"

The liberal arts graduate asks, "Would you like fries with that?" 

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Why did the germ cross the microscope?

To get to the other slide.

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Whenever I go to a restaurant, I always order is "dihydrogen monoxide on the rocks with a clear siphoning tube inside a glass".

The waiters/waitresses always ask me what drink is that?

I tell them that's the scientific name of a glass of ice water with a straw.

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John asks: Why are you drinking so much?
Joe says: Because I donated my body to science, and I am preserving it until they are ready to use it.

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Helium walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve noble gases here." Helium doesn't react.

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A graduate with a science degree asks, "Why does it work?"
A graduate with an engineering degree asks, "How does it work?"
A graduate with an accounting degree asks, "How much it cost?"
A graduate with a liberal arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

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Has anyone had a look in Schrödinger’s grave to see if he’s in there?

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According to Albert Einstein there is nothing faster than the speed of light.

But he is wrong... you can make something much more faster than light:

1. First take torch or a flash light.
2. Now take a video camera and record it.
3. Now put the video you have recorded in to your video player.

4. FAST FORWARD THE VIDEO.

CONGRATULATIONS YOU GOT SOMETHING FASTER THAN THE SPEED OF LIGHT!

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News: “Lab-grown penises ready for testing on men”
Now I’m no scientist but I can see a fundamental error here.

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