One day YouTube, Twitter and Facebook will merge and be known as YouTwitFace :)

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Taking a dump in a bar is the equivalent of eating spinach as a kid...I will do everything in my power to avoid it.

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The Mayans predicted that the world would end on December 21rst. I predicted that I'd be filty rich by the age of 18. I guess we both were wrong.

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if the mud ain't flyin you ain't tryin

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Bumper sticker: "Last Christmas I got a new rifle for my wife. Good trade, don't you think?"

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The economy is getting so bad; the other day my ATM gave me an IOU.

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I do what I want, where I want, when I want.... If my Mom says its ok.

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Sushi lovers... they are "hooked" on raw fish.

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If life is handing you melons... You might be dyslexic.

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I named my hard drive "dat ass" so once a month my computer asks if I want to 'back dat ass up'.

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Q: How does a teenage schoolboy propose marriage?
A: YOUR HAVING A WHAT!?!

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