My mates call me gay because I can’t stay on a skateboard for longer than a minute.
I’d like to see them try it with high heels on.

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Two couples decide to spend the weekend away together at a posh hotel.
When they get there, one guy suggests they indulge in partner-swapping as a trial.
After 2 hours of solid sex by the fireside, the guy turned to his new partner and said, "Wow! This is the very best sex I've had in years! I wonder how the girls are doing?"

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Men need to stop staring and yelling at me when I wear yoga pants. I’m not doing it for you. I’m doing it for me, because it’s comfortable…
..
..
..
Who cares if you can see my balls?

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Three guys are arrested in an adult book store and appear before the judge.
He asks the first guy to stand:
"What is your name?" he asked.
"John," the guy answered.
"And why were you arrested?" the judge asked.
"I was by the magazine rack holding a big fat cigar and blowing smoke." he answered.
The judge didn't see anything wrong with that, so he dismissed the guy and called up the next one.
"What's your name?" he asked.
"John," the guy answered.
"Why were you arrested?" the Judge asked.
"I was by the magazine rack holding a big fat cigar and blowing smoke." he answered.
Again, the judge saw nothing offensive, 'This so-called adult store is begining to sound more like a smoking club!' he thought.
So he dismissed the charge and called up the next guy.
"What's your name?? No wait, let me guess; John." he said.
"No," said the guy, "My name is Smoke."

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Someone asked me how I view Lesbian relationships. Apparently, "in HD" wasn't the correct answer.

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Men are like.....Blenders.
You need one, but you're not quite sure why.

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Same sex marriage? Hell, I know couples who would be happy with a SOME sex marriagesecond

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I was minding my own business in the pub last night when a man came over to me and said, “You look like a poof.”
I was so outraged I immediately challenged him to a dance off.

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Now that India has allowed homosexuality, the first lesbian couple have got married.
So congratulations to Sukma Flaps and Makemaclit Singh

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Being gay before the invention of lube…


Must’ve been a real pain in the ass…

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Mother, “I think our son’s gay”.
Father, “What makes you think that?”
Mother, “Have you seen the skid marks in his undies?”
Father, “Yeah, but even we have skiddies in ours now and then”.
Mother, “True - but not at the fucking front”

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