What did the hurricane say to the coconut palm tree?

Hold on to your nuts, this is no ordinary blow job!

View More

I shagged a bird last night. Keep it quiet though, I don’t want her to find out.

View

my longest record without masturbating is 11 years!!!! That was the first 11 years of my life.

View

Hi,
I feel so dirty right now, PLEASE DO ME!
Love,
The Dishes

View

Yo mama is so stupid that she went to see a doctor the other day because she found a crack in her ass.

View

A guy and a girl are lying in a dorm-room bed after just having sex. The guy lies on his side of the bed and rests. The girl rolls to her side of the bed and says to herself, "I finally did it! I'm no longer a virgin."
The guy overhears her talking to herself and asks, "Are you saying you lost your virginity to me?"
"Well," the girl explains, "I always wanted to wait until I was with the man I love to lose my virginity."
Astounded, the guy replies, "So you really love me?"
"Oh God no!" the girl says. "I just got sick of waiting."

View

What did the blind man say as he walked past the fishmongers?
"Morning Girls!"

View

LIFE IS LIKE SEX,
YOU CAN EITHER LIE BACK AND LET IT SCREW YOU, OR
YOU AN GET ON
TOP AND RIDE THE
HELL OUT OF IT

View

why would you use a balloon not a condom
so you can give proper blowjobs

View

Saw a topless women get attacked by a couple of teenage girls today while she was sunbathing on the beach.
I tried to help but I could only knock one out.

View

Two girls one cup. Kickass if you get it.

View